Why? Why do people feel the need to "one up" other people?
I went to the mall to return something today. It was 25 degrees with 20 mph wind. It was cold. I was wearing a puffy coat my sister got me for Christmas last year because when I was outside I FELT COLD. During the exchange at the store the lady behind the counter asked me a question.
(Lady behind the counter) - "That looks like a warm coat. Is it cold outside?"
(Me) - "Yes. Not quite as bad as yesterday but it's about 25 (degrees) and the wind is whippin' today."
(LBTC) - (laughing grunt) "That seems warm to me. Where I am from it's 40 below!"
(ME) - "Where are you from?"
(One upper lady) - (smugly) "South Dakota"
(Me) - (in my mind) "South Dakota huh? So that's why you're socially awkward."
Obviously I didn't say that but SERIOUSLY LADY? That seems warm to you? Do you know the ideal temperature for a standard refrigerator is from 35-40 degrees fahrenheit? Are you ever at your house and you think, "hmmm, it's chilly in here. I think I'll jump in the fridge and warm up!"? I don't think so. Cold is cold.
This happens all the time at the hotel. People, mostly fat guys, will be out of the warm hotel for five seconds, see all the valets bundled up and say, "You guys act like it's cold out here. This aint cold!"
A. If this isn't cold then come hang out with us for eight hours in your sleeveless shirt and overalls.
B. Why don't you just say, "I don't have a very high self esteem so I am going to build myself up by saying that I am more of a man than you are because I don't think this is cold and you do, you panzie a$$"
C. You might be warmer because of all the extra layers of fat protecting you from the cold the same way a manatee, aka "the sea cow, is protected from the arctic waters.
I guess if you like to insult people in a somewhat indirect manner, learn the art of one-upping. If you want to be a good person ,let people tell their stories and have their opinions. I promise everyone will like you more or at least dislike you less.
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2 comments:
Yeah. I wrote a blog about being cold one time. but it not only had examples A, B, and C but also D.
TIP YOUR VALETS!!!
I meant to comment on this during Christmas break but I read 'B' and was in hysterics. I miss you! I wish Boise and Nashville were 20 minutes apart.
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